Who do you trust when life takes an unexpected turn

Who do you trust when life takes an unexpected turn?

Blackbird and Finch blog post - Who do you trust when life takes an unexpected turn?Do you remember playing the trust game as a kid? You stand up tall, with your eyes closed, your ‘friend’ stands behind you and you start to lean backward. Will your friend catch you in their arms or will they let you fall to the ground and get hurt?

Thinking back to playing this game as a kid, my true friends would always catch me. No-one wants to see a friend get hurt, but the kids I didn’t know well and were merely acquaintances would have no hesitation to let me fall to the ground.

The word friend is greatly overused these days, thanks to Facebook and similar social media platforms. I receive ‘friend requests’ all the time and I have no idea who some of the people are. Why would I want them to see what is happening in my life, see photos of my kids and my home, where and when I am on holidays?

The days of keeping things private seem to be a distant memory and in regional cities and towns, it seems like there is only one degree of separation between you and the next person.

When you are going through a life changing event, especially a painful one like separation, divorce or financial hardship, you have to make hard decisions on who to trust and confide in. You need to decide how much of your change in circumstances you want to divulge to family, friends, work colleagues and acquaintances.

I have been witness to friends shouting from the roof-top that they are separating from their partner – posting it on Facebook with no hesitation on who knows their business. Their relationship status has changed from ‘in a relationship’ or ‘married’ to ‘separated’ or ‘it’s complicated’. I have also had friends separate very quietly – only finding out about it months later when the feelings aren’t so raw and they feel that they can talk about it.

When life changing events occur, our emotions are raw, especially within the first couple of days or weeks when we are trying to process what has happened. Think back to your feelings when your children were born, the day you got engaged or the day you heard a dear family member or friend passed away.

If it is good news, we all shout it from the roof-top, tweet to let the world know and post on Facebook. But how often do you see posts from family and friends when things aren’t going well in their life – rarely? We try and keep up the perception that everything is rosy in our world.

But what do you do when the bubble has in fact burst? Maybe it has been a slow progressive downward spiral, thinking that things will get better and you told yourself to just give it a bit more time? Perhaps yesterday you woke up and everything was fine, but today your world has come crashing down and everything you thought you knew is being questioned.

When your world is turned upside down, you need to lean on those nearest and dearest to you. The ones that love you unconditionally, who are there for you no matter what and will help you to pick up the pieces. You need people that you can trust and rely upon. Don’t rush into making decisions without consulting with trusted advisers.

If you find yourself in the position where you want or need to sell your home so you can start to move forward, you need to find an agent you can trust. An agent that understands what you are going through and is there to hold your hand. An agent to guide you when you need guidance and an agent that you unconditionally trust to do the right thing by you and your family.

Always remember that as a seller, the agent is working for you –  you get to call the shots. If you are uncomfortable with an aspect of the sale, trust your instinct and speak up. Explain why you are uncomfortable and ask for alternatives.

But you don’t want a ‘yes’ agent either – someone that will only tell you what you want to hear. You need them to tell it like it is, not to sugar coat it or butter you up. An agent that is not being honest and open is doing a disservice to you but also to themselves. You need to know all the facts so you can make an informed decision.

You need to be able to have a frank, open and honest discussion about your situation, your timeframe and what you hope to achieve so you can put the wheels in motion to start moving forward and not backward.

If you would like to book a free 15-minute, confidential discussion with Simone to discuss your situation text ’15minutes’ to Simone’s mobile 0400 824 634 or click on the ‘Need Help’ button to have an online chat.